My secrets, revealed

It’s all Steve’s fault. What was he thinking? I'm hosting brunch for 18 tomorrow, despite throwing out my back. And what does he do? Hands me my procrastination on a platter. I owe you a beer, man.

1. I can't believe I've never...dyed my hair a crazy color. Seriously.
2. Every time I think about...the condition of this house when we bought it, and the fact that we had parties in it anyway...I still cringe.
3. I wish I’d…traveled the world more...when I had the chance.
4. I’ve never felt so out of place as when I…hmmm. I don’t know. That’s the sort of thing I forget about as soon as I can.
5. How much time I spend reading for pleasure…is my guiltiest pleasure. And watching “The Biggest Loser” while eating junk food.
6. I hope…N...know(s) how grateful I am for…putting up with me.
7. In my darkest hours, I secretly blame…necrophilia...for my dysfunction.
8. Having two beautiful daughters…changed my life forever.
9. My earliest remembered moment is...actually a dream, which I still remember in some detail.

And I tag this guy I vaguely know: The Monkey King