Scenario 1: My friend Jill is driving her minivan and asks me to pay the $5 parking fee, as she has no cash. No problem, sez I. I open my wallet and consider my options. Do I want to break a 20? Sort of, but that’s annoying at a parking garage. Hmm, I have a lot of singles. I could use those. But that’s kind of obnoxious at a parking garage, too. I have a $5 bill. I guess I’ll just use that. I hold it up to the light, idly checking the anti-counterfeit strip. Jill is still driving down the long ramps, around and around toward the exit. She turns to me and says, “Is that the one, then?” We dissolve in laughter at how ridiculous I am.
Scenario 2: We’re putting together dinner. It’s steak salad with garlic bread. She makes the garlic bread the way her mom does, with floofy white bread and butter and garlic salt. There’s a little bit of bread left. We’re discussing how our parents sometimes undermine our attempts to have our children eat healthy meals. Jill says, “Yeah, we were eating dinner, and my mom gives my daughter three pieces of buttered bread! That’s just so unnecessary.” I nod and make sincere “I agree” noises. She looks over at me. I’ve stuffed another piece of the leftover white floofy bread into my mouth, so I can’t actually talk. We laugh so hard I’m worried I’m going to pee my pants.
Texting with Frank
1 day ago