The magic of Christmas

N on left, me on right

Boo has been making Christmas cards for a few years now. I'd say three, maybe four. She has always enjoyed doing crafts, so it seemed like a good way to channel her energy for the weeks leading up to the holidays. I always had extra store-bought cards for if/when her creativity dried up. I certainly didn't want to be some horrible mom, forcing the poor kid to make card after card, the tears and the glitter mingling.

It's supposed to be a happy memory.

Which is why I only make Nea do one or two cards a year, since she hates crafts.

Anyway. One step in our creative process is cutting up the more useable cards from the previous year. I give you one such repurposed card, surrounded by more innocent efforts.

I wish you could see the glitter in the fartcloud better.

N and I really egged her on, among our peals of laughter. Her comment was "Are you sure this is appropriate?" Great. Outdone in maturity by a seven-year-old. Ouch.

My best effort for what the inside of the card should say was, "Wow, even his farts smell like Christmas!" I think N's was, "The magic of Christmas lies in your farts," but I could be misremembering. I was laughing pretty hard.

Only use your powers to do good

In the car, Boo (age 6.5, Kindergarten) wanted math questions. As usual. She’d been talking about how if she bought a condo, she’d let her friends live there, too. I asked whether they’d have to pay for water and electricity and such, and she said, maybe $50 per month. I said, if they paid $50 a month, how much would they be paying a year? No hesitation, she answers $600. Flat out. I thought I’d have to walk her through the middle steps a little.

I know it sounds like I’m bragging, but mostly I’m just amazed. Kid’s got the mad math skillz, yo. And it’s not like we did anything to make her good at math. Or, more importantly, enjoy math. Beg for more math. Momma, more math questions, please! Crazy kid.

Kindergarten isn’t like it used to be

Boo’s 100th day of Kindergarten is tomorrow. It’s a big event with lots of fun activities. She’s in a full-day program, which the district switched to two years ago. She’s reading and writing and all that cool stuff.

For the 100th day, every kindergartener was assigned this project. Take 100 of something and put it on a posterboard and give an oral presentation. From Boo's assignment sheet: Your child will be assessed on verbal delivery, nonverbal delivery (eye contact), organization (details on collection), language/grammar, and visual support (shows item brought in).

So we picked “beads” as our collection. We decided on 5 groups of 20 on pipe cleaners, stapled to the posterboard. We practiced her presentation, as instructed. But is this not nuts?! It’s KINDERGARTEN. I think PowerPoint must start in first grade, then.

Our little neighbor Luke was deciding what to use for his 100 collection. He wanted to do chickens. Seriously. His parents said they were too big. So he said, “oh, oh! Chicks!” Still totally serious. They said, still too big. So he said, “oh, oh! Eggs!” I’m not sure what he eventually picked, but I like the visual of 100 chickens flapping their wings, stapled to posterboard. And the visual of 100 eggs taped to posterboard.

Boo luves Nea

When the kids are bickering, it’s nice to reflect on the sweet things they do when no one is watching. Boo made this heart for Nea and posted it above her bed (using masking tape, as she has been taught. She’s a big wall-coverer in her artistic creations.)





Side one: I luve you










Side two: [Heart] Ernie [Heart]

Deuces and toothes wild

We played poker Saturday night at our neighbor’s house, while the kids ran around in dress-up clothes. Boo called poker “Pokémon.” Of course, she just lost one of her front teeth on Monday, so it’s hard to take anything she says particularly seriously. She pulled it out herself during lunch in front of an audience of 5 kids. They were all very quiet and respectful. I think they were all thinking, “Dude, do NOT piss off that girl. She can rip out your teeth like THAT.” Then we passed it around in a plastic container. Instant show-n-tell magic.

Back to the poker. It was the first time in 9 years or so. We lost 3 large. (For definitions of large which equal a dollar.) Nickel ante is my friend! Then went home and watched Owning Mahowny (with Philip Seymour Hoffman). Good stuff and good timing. Note to self: do not become addicted to gambling. Looks like a crappy existence. He was not playing nickel ante at ALL.

Boo's first email

Boo missed school so much she wanted to write her teacher an email. Here it is. The only thing I spelled for her was "hello" because she was having trouble getting started.

Honestly, I didn't even know Yahoo Mail had emoticons and stationary until now.

[Don't mind my crappy-looking name censoring.]

The story of Blue Bear

Blue Bear with friend

Once upon a time there was a girl and her Blue Bear. They were of great comfort to each other. They cuddled. They had birthday parties for Bear. Weekly.

Bear went to the store and the library and the park. Sometimes they sang. Bear was often dressed in jammies with little red hearts on them, or his pink comfy loungewear. Recently, he even acquired a fancy metal and wooden tricycle.

Boo knew where her Bear was at all times. She wouldn’t sleep without him.

Alas, all things come to an end. One rainy night this week, Blue Bear spent the lonely hours in the playhouse, alone, outside. In the morning, Boo put on her rain boots and rain jacket and rescued him. But what does it mean, when he is so totally forgotten until the next day? Will he forgive this? Can he ever forget?

On the other hand, last night Bear started the night across the room in a little bed of blankets, but when I checked on Boo later, his whole sleeping ensemble had moved into her bed. She was probably worried about him, with his “broken leg” and all. Poor Bear.

We are Ralph groupies now

We saw Ralph’s World at the Morton Arboretum last weekend. As usual, he rocked. Boo and I have been to 5 of his shows now. Nea was anti-loud noises for quite awhile, but she danced and danced at the show. Outdoor venues are the way to go for the little people.

After we’d seen him in December, Boo made this diorama. I especially like the stage diver/techie guy at the top. And the passed out people on the right.

For comparison, here’s the kids at the actual show (photo by Stacia)

I think she pretty much nailed it.

How I spent my summer vacation

How I have longed for this day. Finally, after nearly 6 years of waiting, I climbed as I was always meant to climb. To the top of a 24 foot tower! Three times! And again the next day!

Love, Boo

Boo

I know I talk too much about Nea on this blog and not enough about Boo. That’s because Boo is a normal going-on-6 year old, who doesn’t cause me anxiety attacks. So, here’s what Boo is up to these days:

• She is a monkey on the flying trapeze of our playset. She does amazing tricks all day every day, unless she is inside playing with the dollhouse.
• She wants to play “puppy” all day with Nea.
• She wants to draw all day.
• She bikes and scooters up and down the driveway all day. She’s now on a trail-a-bike thing when we do longer rides, which she really enjoys. She's so big!
• She’s out of her pirate stage, and into Star Wars. She’s seen all 6 movies, and if you have a problem with that, go talk to N. It’s all his fault.

As you can see, that adds up to a lot more than a normal day’s worth of activity, which is why she’s so busy all the time.

Grace

Our little friend Grace (age 5) is really shaping up to be a fabulous person. She had an embarrassing story that she had told Boo to keep a secret.* But it got babbled at the dinner time, in front of her family and ours. Grace turns to Nea and says, “Don’t tell anyone, ok?” My heart just melted. Sniff!


*I totally want to tell you all the story, because it is also adorable, but a promise is a promise.

Mad Math Skillz

We often snuggle in bed in the morning, just me and the girls. N is off to work at the buttcrack of down, actually earlier.

The other day Boo says, “Mama, what’s 24 and 24?”
I say “48”
What’s 24 less, then?
24.
Oh, ok, then what’s 12 less?
36.
Oh, then we haven’t seen Papa in 36 hours.

I was impressed. Of course, I had no idea where she was going with that line of questioning. Later that same day we had her parent-teacher conference. We are chatting about how “delightful and well-rounded” she is when she comes up and says “Mama, what’s 4 and 4 and 4?” And I walk her through 4+4, and then 4 more. The teacher turns to me and says, “I don’t think you should have any concerns about her.” Nice timing, kid! Make a Mama proud.

Aww!

This weekend my daughter Boo (age 5) looked up from a toy catalog and asked me seriously, "Mama, does Santa visit people who celebrate harmonica?"